Friday | August 22nd, 2008
As per Misti’s request, I just made a vertical banner which should be “side-bar” friendly-and this one animates :). Enjoy! And be sure to let us know if you use it! thanks 
If any of you readers run your own blog or website and would like to link to our site from yours, I have created a web banner for just such an occasion. Here it is! And be sure and let us know if you do link to us (we’d love to check your site out as well of course 
)
Do you realize that I know six people whose birthdays were yesterday?! And like another dozen over the previous fortnight!
Good Gravy! What is wrong with you people? Did you get yourselves mixed up with the noble wildebeast, 
that gives birth enmasse within the space of a few days? Good preservation instinct though, got to give you that. Mass birth means predators will have more easy targets but within a brief period of time, thus reducing chances of multiple young being taken. So good job you guys. Anything to keep them filthy hyenas hungry I say.
Anyhoo, writing all of those birthday greetings reminded me of how seriously wierd it is to write birthday greetings. I know what the idea is behind wishing people a happy birthday. It is supposed to be something like this:
Associate: Hello Friend/Kinship-Group-Member/Person-I-Am-Romantically-Interested-In. I have remembered that it is the anniversary of your birth. I am so overjoyed at the fact that one day not so long ago you were born and were destined to become a shining light, a beacon if you will, of hope and joy and laughter in my life. If not for you my life would be woefully empty. And so for all of the things you have done and mean to me I wish all of your days, but this day most of all, to be full of happiness and luck and blessings. Here is a token of my esteem that I hope you accept even though it fails completely to show the depths of my respect for you. I look forward to knowing you in the many years ahead and am thankful for having known you so long already. If there is any sorrow on this day it is that I have not known you longer and that it is unknowable how long we shall both trod this earth before we pass. But know that I look forward to decades of continued satisfying mutual social obligation to each other.
Birthday-ee: Thank you for that sincere and heartfelt expression of affection and respect, oh great and good Friend/Kinship-Group-Member/Person-Who-Is-Romantically-Interested-In-Me of mine. Rest assured that the feeling is mutual and that our social ties have been reinforced and strengthened by both your words, wishes, and gifts. Truely no physical object was neeeded for me to know the esteem you hold me in. And I to look forward to being involved in decades of continued satisfying mutual social obligation to each other as well. For you are so important and so excellent an asociate that I have completely forgotten about my age and am now full of joy and youthfull vitality. I thank you.
That is all well and good. But that is not what I or anyone else hears. I think that is because all of us know that a birthday is just another reminder to us all that we are going to lose everything we ever had that was worth having or wanted, grow old, and die unloved. Even as I say my well intentioned birthday greetings I feel like everyone hears:
Me: Hey, how you doing? It is your birthday? Oh. Sorry I forgot but I been busy. And we both know that this doesn’t mean as much to me as it does to you. And you really shouldn’t care about this that much anyways, you selfish jerk. Well congrats on not dying on this last trip around the Sun. You really didn’t accomplish what you wanted to on this trip around it did ya? That’s okay because ultimately you are on this Earth for such a short time that you never really had a chance of making a difference anyways. Hope you won’t die to soon. And if that doesn’t happen then I also hope things don’t suck to bad for ya before you die. See ya.
Whenever I go to a birthday party I feel like the birthday boy thinks we are all really saying: We all know you’re going to die! But way to cheat death for another year! Each time we have another sheet cake with your name and candles on it is just our way to remind ourselves that you can’t outrun the Grim Reaper forever! Now eat the cake and pretend to like the gifts and stop crying about your squandered youth and opportunities and pretend that you care about us as much as we pretend to care about you, you self-pitying crybaby. Because there is no way you could have made it this far through this hellish day without us!
Pretty brutal isn’t it?
Isn’t that awesome!
Makes me want to post some Metalocalypse \”Dethday\” episode outtakes. But as that is definetly a hard PG-13 for, well, being Metalocalypse, I can’t.
Brutal.
-Bob
Apparently this is old, but I had never seen it before:
I’ve been meaning to post this for some time now. My wife wrote up some Boodachitaville lyrics- to the tune of Jimmy Buffet’s “Margaritaville”. So without further adieu, I give them to you! (Don’t forget if anyone has any fan art/song/whatever for B’ville, just shoot us an email and we’ll gladly post it!
Sippin’ on tea leaves
Watchin’ the Brook Street
All of those people haven’t a clue.
Rackin’ at my brains in front of Coffee Stains
Look at that woman’s
Donkey tattoo
Nothin’ to do again in Boodachitaville,
Wish there was something besides the mall
Some people claim that our town’s really lame,
But I know it’s not our fault.
Playin’ my keytar
Gonna be a rock star
If only my Heeleys don’t throw me down
My cartoon’s in the background
It’s really profound, I know I’m gonna be
the talk of the town.
Nothin’ to do again in Boodachitaville,
Wish there was something besides the mall
Some people claim that our town’s really lame,
But I know it’s not our fault.
–Eric
